Understanding Compulsive Behavior

Compulsion is defined as an irresistible urge to perform a certain act, regardless of the rationality of the act. Compulsive behavior is thought to affect millions of people in their everyday lives. While the incidence of compulsive behaviors may be the same in both sexes, there seems to be increased awareness of these behaviors in women. This is due in part to the willingness of women to talk about their compulsions and seek professional assistance.

Most of us react negatively to the word "addiction." We are uncomfortable using this term to describe our behavior. But as work in the field of compulsive and addictive behaviors has grown, many therapists and counselors have broadened their focus to include actions that are common to many of us in our everyday lives. In so doing, the terms compulsion and addiction are used interchangeably to describe the similar, yet complex, processes involved in such activities.

Compulsive behaviors have an ability to produce a positive and pleasurable mood change. They remove us from our true feelings, and can provide a form of escape. However, over the long haul, these compulsions can control the individual, becoming unhealthy and destructive. Some of the behaviors that are generally included in this broad focus are smoking, overworking, overeating, drinking, shopping, taking drugs, dieting, gambling, and unhealthy relationships. In fact, many therapists believe that almost any activity has the potential to become compulsive for a given individual.

The foundation for compulsive behavior is within each of us. This foundation consists of a normal desire to live with the least amount of pain and the greatest amount of pleasure possible. In addition, a general mistrust of the world we live in and a pessimism about life is thought to contribute to this foundation. Such feelings and beliefs are often established in childhood, and influenced by relationships within the family. A person with low self-esteem, who has learned that other people are not to be trusted and therefore has difficulty developing healthy relationships, is more likely to develop compulsive behavior patterns as a way to cope with stress in his or her life.

The development of compulsive patterns is a process which occurs over time. In the initial stages of learning, the individual discovers that an activity or behavior, whether drinking, gambling, shopping or eating, feels good. And, initially, there are no bad effects of these activities, so the behaviors are repeated. The seduction of the action lies in its ability to produce good feelings on a consistent basis, allowing escape from problems or situations that cause pain or produce anxiety.

The second stage of compulsion development occurs when the behavior, instead of creating good feelings and providing a release for the person, begins to create new problems. As the compulsion continues, concern and worry about the behavior and the apparent inability to control it may develop. As a result, self-esteem suffers even more. This effect may, in turn, reinforce the compulsive pattern.

The chronic nature of the behavior is the final stage of this process. The activities are repeated so frequently and continuously that the behavior is controlling the life of the individual. The behavior begins taking priority over friends, family, and self.

For many people, gaining control of their lives begins with the recognition of compulsive tendencies. The desire to control these behaviors reflects a positive step toward personal growth and greater self-awareness. It is important to understand that compulsive patterns do not develop overnight. Learning new ways to manage stress and anxiety in your life will take time as well.

Support groups and counseling services are important tools to help learn new ways to manage problems in a more healthful way. Individual or group therapy provides a unique opportunity to develop insight with the help of a trained professional in a safe setting. For more information on a counselor and therapist located near you, call your Mental Health agency.

Spiritual resources are important for a balanced approach to handling any circumstance of life. In a relationship with God, people have the assurance that God is with them always.