{"id":2126,"date":"2021-10-27T05:00:45","date_gmt":"2021-10-27T09:00:45","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.namb.net\/church-replanting\/?post_type=resource&p=2126"},"modified":"2021-10-27T15:14:43","modified_gmt":"2021-10-27T19:14:43","slug":"13-things-churchgoers-should-never-say-to-a-pastor","status":"publish","type":"resource","link":"https:\/\/www.namb.net\/church-replanting\/resource\/13-things-churchgoers-should-never-say-to-a-pastor\/","title":{"rendered":"13 Things Churchgoers Should Never Say to a Pastor"},"content":{"rendered":"

Previously, Joe McKeever wrote about\u00a013 things a pastor should never say to<\/strong><\/a>\u00a0a congregation. After a disclaimer about obvious no-no\u2019s, he went on to list things some pastors may be tempted to say to their church.<\/p>\n

But as we think about Pastor Appreciation Month, what if we flipped it to the 13 things a member should never say to a pastor?<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve heard some doozies over the years, like the time a disgruntled member said, \u201cI don\u2019t care what the Bible says; I don\u2019t like it.\u201d Or the time another said, \u201cWe don\u2019t need too much Scripture in a sermon; it\u2019s outdated.\u201d<\/p>\n

After 21 years of ministry, I could build the list myself, but I asked some other pastors for input. Some of the responses were sad, some downright mean, but here are 13 things a member should never say to a pastor.<\/p>\n

1. \u201cYou couldn\u2019t preach your way out of a paper bag.\u201d<\/strong>
\nThe gift of discouragement is strong with this one. Pray for your pastor, encourage him, but don\u2019t tear him down.<\/p>\n

2. \u201cWe get it; we need to share the gospel. Find something else to preach.\u201d<\/strong>
\nFrankly, they should take this up with Jesus (Matt. 4:19-20, 28:19\u201320; Mark 16:15; Acts 1:8) and Paul (Rom. 10:14\u201315; 2 Tim. 2:2).<\/p>\n

3. \u201cI can\u2019t look at you when you preach because you don\u2019t wear a suit. Aren\u2019t you the High Priest of this church?! You are supposed to dress like it.\u201d<\/strong>
\nAs one who\u2019ll wear ugly Christmas suits, it wouldn\u2019t be the most shocking thing for me to wear robes with bells and pomegranates on the fringe. But focus less on what your pastor wears and more on living out what he proclaims.<\/p>\n

4. \u201cWe aren\u2019t going to get as close to you as the last pastor.\u201d<\/strong>
\nTo be honest, you may be correct, but your previous pastor is not your last pastor\u2013\u2013your current pastor serves you now. Open your heart and life to him, give it some time with prayer and faithfulness, and you may be surprised.<\/p>\n

5. \u201cYou obviously don\u2019t look at my tithe amount.\u201d<\/strong>
\nThis was similar to \u201cI tithe, so I pay your salary, which means you work for me,\u201d and is usually said by someone who didn\u2019t get their way. This isn\u2019t \u201cpay to play;\u201d you give to advance God\u2019s kingdom.<\/p>\n

6. \u201cPreacher, that was a good message. It would have been better if you weren\u2019t so fat.\u201d<\/strong>
\nWhile a pastor should strive to be spiritually, emotionally and physically healthy, saying this is hateful. Please don\u2019t.<\/p>\n

7. \u201cYou can preach, but you\u2019re a crappy pastor.\u201d<\/strong>
\nThe preacher to whom they said this replied that they were probably correct, but it\u2019d be better for you to pray for your pastor and help him with your words, than to punish and hurt.<\/p>\n

8. \u201cStop preaching about our sin. We already know what we are doing wrong. Just preach love.\u201d<\/strong>
\nLove is important, but so is sin. Remember, \u201cthere is nothing covered that won\u2019t be uncovered, nothing hidden that won\u2019t be made known\u201d (Luke 12:2).<\/p>\n

9. \u201cYou\u2019re an elder? Wow! I don\u2019t know what to say \u2026.\u201d<\/strong>
\nLet me finish that sentence, \u201c… other than I\u2019m grateful for you, praying for you and can\u2019t wait to see what God does in and through you.\u201d<\/p>\n

10. \u201cI\u2019m leaving because it\u2019s too cold in here. We need to keep it at 78.\u201d<\/strong>
\nMost of these were pretty harsh, so I thought I\u2019d lighten it up a bit with the silliest words ever uttered in a church building. Everyone knows it\u2019s 68.<\/p>\n

11. \u201cYou just canceled church during COVID so you could have more vacation time.\u201d<\/strong>
\nWorst. Vacation. Ever.<\/p>\n

12. \u201cI didn\u2019t vote for you, and I still wouldn\u2019t. I just don\u2019t like you.\u201d<\/strong>
\nHonesty may be the best policy, but silence is golden.<\/p>\n

13. \u201cEventually, you\u2019ll figure out how to preach.\u201d<\/strong>
\nIt would take everything in me not to reply, \u201cEventually, you\u2019ll figure out how to respect your pastor,\u201d but that\u2019d be equally prideful and unhelpful. Instead, grace goes a long way. Give your preacher some grace and lift him to the Father in prayer; don\u2019t tear him down.<\/p>\n

A lot of work goes into crafting sermons and ministering to the needs of church members, so respect and humble prayer will help your pastor far more than biting criticism.<\/p>\n

This post originally appeared at <\/em>Lifeway Research.<\/em><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Previously, Joe McKeever wrote about\u00a013 things a pastor should never say to\u00a0a congregation. After a disclaimer …<\/p>\n

13 Things Churchgoers Should Never Say to a Pastor<\/span> Read More »<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"featured_media":2127,"template":"","meta":{"_oasis_is_in_workflow":0,"_oasis_original":0,"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"default","ast-site-content-layout":"","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"default","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-gradient":""}}},"tags":[],"channels":[],"topics":[53],"languages":[],"class_list":["post-2126","resource","type-resource","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","resource_type-article","topics-replanting"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\n13 Things Churchgoers Should Never Say to a Pastor - Church Replanting<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.namb.net\/church-replanting\/resource\/13-things-churchgoers-should-never-say-to-a-pastor\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"13 Things Churchgoers Should Never Say to a Pastor\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Previously, Joe McKeever wrote about\u00a013 things a pastor should never say to\u00a0a congregation. 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